optimistic

Right now, I am so wide-awake at 1:17am. I’ve got boggled eyes and a heavy head but I need to move forward. I need to make a way to figure out several tight spots (aahh~). Where’s my brain? I think I’m losing it but I asked God to give it all back. I am in need of more active brain tissues to run in a well-synchronized manner and to become accustomed conscientiously. I am longing for ancient memories of college day’s thesis type attitude, where you can only see and hear codes, scripts, lessons, numbers, mathematical equations, chemical equations, and the likes.

They all need to come back now and they really should. 

Somehow, the recent intellectual capability still can cope but there are words like “focus” and “concentration”, which must strongly exist. I believe everything will be laid in crystal clear, thus must take away the doubt. It is not hard, indeed not complicated; a thought of do-not-work-on-anything-else and keep-the-internet-away-for-a-while should be hugged real tight. You must do it, or else you’re dead (wrong words). 

Telling to myself: You have a deadline, you have a goal, you have a duty, you have a promise, you have a commitment, and you have a responsibility to become knowledgeable enough to do things right. Aw~ 

Always remember that you have a team and nothing can be achieved if you have nothing else to retrieve. Seek assistance, make a move, keep on track, and never let a day pass without stepping one step higher. I am so incompetent said no and I'm starting to think that what I thought as my ticket out of or way to deal is to lose hope. No, I won’t lose hope. I have Jesus Christ and He won’t let me down so as my superiors. I still need to push myself harder and always remember to utilize all resources I can have then move faster. Ah, I should not forget all these; I know I brought something from where I came from. Also, I musn’t forget to take advantage of every opportunity faced before me. I must double the effort, think accurately, but the most important of all is to lay all things in heaven because God is just watching from above. Are all these things easier said than done? No, certainly not. 

Be happy even if some things are really hard to comprehend. 

My Come Back Post

This morning, I wrote my grocery list and thought of some dishes to cook. I’ve tried to search Google for commonly consumed Filipino foods I really missed since I am away from my family. I wanted to get back to the scent of being home. I’ve got afritada (chicken type dish), caldereta (spicy beef type), beef stew, chicken curry (glad my colleague left her curry powder at home), lumpiang shanghai or the likes (dunno if it is really Chinese cuisine), monggo soup (with pork), ampalaya dishes (it takes more than an hour drive to get this veggie). 

Cooking is a skill that one must practice too although some people are really gifted with an expertise on it. For me, being alone and enjoying own cooked meal is a bliss. I am not a good cook but I know this career will make one survive in any place he/she would be. 

I want to try some with more vegetables because some foods in this place where I am has too much of something, plus they cost quiet a lot. I think it is best to cook my own food, thus I must to rush to the supermarket. 

Furthermore, I would like to visit a theme park today but I decided to postpone because I need to work on something more important. I know life should be savored while opportunity lasts but still I should not forget my duty and why I was brought here. I have responsibilities that should not be neglected. 

Got to go food shopping now. Post later.~^^